Megan is knitting on the porch.\u00a0 Kai is playing in the pool with Gilang and Gita, twelve years and eight years old respectively.\u00a0 By this time, they are acting like older brothers and younger sister.\u00a0 They tease her, and at the same time, they appease her.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s the lazy part of the day for everyone.\u00a0 Ami, Agung\u2019s wife, and Ayu and Komang, our house caretakers, are sitting in the shaded part of the yard eating cassava.\u00a0 Agung is napping from all of his work at the temple, from driving around three crazy tourists, from being a most gracious host.<\/p>\n
The roosters are crowing, even if it\u2019s almost noon.\u00a0 A bamboo wind chime offsets their discord.<\/p>\n
There is still a lone worker in the rice fields, weeding along the trenches.\u00a0 The rice is growing well, and now it\u2019s just the matter of keeping the water flowin\u2019 and ribbons scarecrow-in\u2019.<\/p>\n
There is a tropical breeze that breaks the intensity of the tropical sun.\u00a0 From my vantage point I see five different shades of pink from flowers that burst out of the neon green leaves.\u00a0 A black and white butterfly just landed on the arm of my bamboo chair.<\/p>\n
My heart is filled with a mixture of euphoria and heaviness as we extract as much as possible from these last few days in Bali.\u00a0 Of course, there has always been gratitude for this experience.\u00a0 I have wanted to come back here for years and I am still pinching myself that we are here.\u00a0 We have been blessed with many unexpected gifts on this trip, the most significant being our local Balinese hosts.\u00a0 I have also been delighted to discover that once I got over the initial shock of Ubud\u2019s changes, I learned to love the town in a different way, discovering that one can still find charm, especially in the corners and around the edges.\u00a0 To have the choice<\/em> of cool cafes (with wireless!) to hang out in is definitely cool<\/em>.\u00a0 To come at this time of the year, after the rainy season, when everything is in full bloom and the backdrop oozes brilliant shades of green is the best I\u2019ve seen yet of Bali\u2019s beauty.\u00a0 Yes, it\u2019s been a spectacular month.<\/p>\n But this time there are more complex emotions that I haven\u2019t quite been able to process.<\/p>\n There is the absence of my friend, Michael, and the disbelief that he is gone from this earth.\u00a0 I sorely missed having his insight on this visit and although I have managed to keep the thoughts of him at bay and therefore keep the knot out of my throat, his presence is everywhere<\/em> in Bali.<\/p>\n In paradise it is easy to forget your troubles.\u00a0 I have done precisely that, but with every little crack and broken brick in the sidewalks of Ubud (of which there are many) I have been reminded of my own brokenness.\u00a0 I have done such a great job of acceptance back home.\u00a0 Acceptance of where I\u2019m at physically, and although I haven\u2019t given up the hope and efforts of a healthier life, I have made peace with my physical limitations.\u00a0 Here, it has been a little harder to accept that I can\u2019t make the walk from Monkey Forest to Jalan Raya, or that every choice I\u2019ve made has had some sort of physical consequence.\u00a0 But we are lucky that there is \u2018transport\u2019 on every corner, waiting to give tired tourists a ride.\u00a0 We are extremely lucky for a pool where I could do my physical therapy safely and the massage lady who has come to our bungalow many times.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t come to Bali looking to be healed, though I would have gladly accepted a splash of that holy water.\u00a0 And I do leave paradise a bit healthier, thanks to the sun and the endless supply of papaya.<\/p>\n Kai has said, \u201cLet\u2019s live here forever!\u201d several times, and I have shot a glance to Megan to see where she\u2019s at.\u00a0 Her brow rises a bit.\u00a0 None of us are ready to leave.\u00a0 We haven\u2019t had enough of this slice of heaven.\u00a0 But I know once we get home, Kai will be greeted with Pooh and Tigger, her princess castle, and her friend Elizabeth, and she will slide right back into place.\u00a0 Megan will see at once that her garden that she started before we left is aching for her love and caring hands and she, too, will slide right in.\u00a0 And me, coming home to my kitchen, my morning writing sessions at JP Licks and seeing all of our dear friends and family will be sublime.<\/p>\n So, the happiness, the heaviness\u2026it\u2019s all good.\u00a0 I wouldn\u2019t have changed a thing.\u00a0 I leave Bali, perhaps not with a completed novel, but a whole arsenal of new memories to draw from for my writing.\u00a0 I have recaptured every sight, smell, sound and feeling\u2026and when I am sitting in Boston, at JP Licks with my coffee and bagel, I will close my eyes and the awareness will be that much stronger.<\/p>\n Thank you for coming along on this journey.\u00a0 I am so grateful for the comments to keep writing, because every artist, I believe, needs that vote of confidence.\u00a0 The next time I write will probably be on U.S. soil as I am expecting that our last few days here will be to savor our time with our new Balinese family and those last few bites of nasi* goring\u2026<\/p>\n Selamat malam.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n *rice.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Megan is knitting on the porch.\u00a0 Kai is playing in the pool with Gilang and Gita, twelve years and eight years old respectively.\u00a0 By this time, they are acting like older brothers and younger sister.\u00a0 They tease her, and at … Continue reading