Welcome!

Thanks for visiting here at Watching the Rice Grow, a writer’s account of a journey that started twenty years ago. It’s also the working title of the novel I’m writing. More on that later…

1992…I was on the brink of turning thirty, embarking on my first solo backpacking trip through South East Asia. I had caught the travel bug from my friend Tom, who convinced me to travel with him in Guatemala earlier that year, and that was it for me. I wanted more. So I asked for a 3-month leave-of-absence from my job and sketched out a plan that included traveling through Thailand, Indonesia, and the Philippines. What happened in those three months proved to be not only life changing but also forever remains the time that all other great moments in my life have had to measure up to.

2012…on the brink of fifty. I’m returning to Bali to chase those memories. I had been back once with Megan in 1997 with expectations that turned into new memories. Now we return with kid and I am certain that Kai will be drawn into the trance of the Bali Spirit as well. Life has changed immensely for me in these past twenty years. But Bali, through its transformation from an underground backpacker destination to a tourist seeking eat-pray-love experience (arg), has, at first glance managed to keep its allure, innocence, and downright awesomeness. I hope to capture some of our experiences in this blog of our thirty days in the rice fields. Some days it might go like, “Today, we watched the rice grow.” Other days it might be like, “Today we played Marco Polo in the pool all day.” Or maybe, “Today, we were transformed.” I invite you to come for the ride.

Background.

In the mid 80’s to early 90’s there was a surge of young travelers who were hungry for off-the-beaten track experiences. They turned to third-world countries where they could get a bungalow on the beach for less than $2.00 a night, or ride elephants through the jungle, or attend High Moon all-night parties on a remote islands. Not unlike how news  spread for the Appalachian Trail sub-culture of hikers, word of these inexpensive exotic travel experiences spread like wild fire, evoking demand for local residents to provide more backpacker accommodations, services, etc. Hostels and bungalows started popping up, targeting this group of low-cost high-experience international travelers. Guide books like Lonely Planet and friends like Tom helped to spread the word.

I was working the ultimate corporate job since straight out of college. For years I did the suits, nylons, high heels, briefcase, the whole bit. After spending my two-week vacation to join Tom in Guatemala, where we rode local buses with a few goats and chickens, climbed volcanoes and pyramids, and stayed in pensions with rooms painted all black, I stopped wearing suits. I stopped wearing a watch. I yearned for a deeper meaning to life beyond programming applications for an insurance company. I started reading about this backpacker sub-culture. I was drawn to the southern islands in Thailand. I was drawn to Bali. I wanted to return to my roots in the Philippines. It was almost too easy the way the trip came to be. After months of planning, suddenly…I was on my way. First stop was Bangkok where I found myself in a hotel room saying, “Uh-oh, what have I done?” But I did one bold thing (I stepped outside my hotel room), and again, the experience unfolded before me, presenting me with other backpackers who would guide the way, awestruck moments that would inspire me to keep going, and enough ignorance to be unaware of potential danger. It was phenomenal.

At the end of my Thailand trip I got very sick on something I ate, and after reading my Lonely Planet book, I believed full-heartedly that I was going to die (alone, in desperation, you can match any of your symptoms to the deadly diseases listed in the guide book). I was fortunate to hook up with a friend in Bangkok who was house-sitting for an American Embassy official. I revived myself on Pizza Hut, Diet Coke, and reruns of Brady Bunch in this swanky apartment equipped with American comforts. But I was apprehensive to continue my travel on to Bali, my next stop. But I took a step forward, and fortunately for me, a young guy from California called Michael at the Bangkok airport gave me just the nudge I needed. He convinced me that Bali was not to be missed and shoved a map in my hands. It involved going through jungle and rice fields, over foot-bridges and muddy ledges to get to this cluster of bungalows completely off the beaten track. At the time I scoffed at the idea of trekking through a jungle to get to a remote bungalow. But one thing led to another, and suddenly I found myself exactly…there. Happy II. Heaven on earth. A set of bungalows, perched in the middle of sprawling rice fields as far as the eye could see. I stayed three weeks in that one spot, meeting people who would become my family in between breakfast and dinner. I did things I can’t believe I was brave enough to do. I saw beauty I never knew existed, in both the land and the people of Bali. Michael arrived at Happy II one week after I plunked myself down on the spot on his map, grinning to find me there. We went around the island on his motorbike and formed a life-long friendship. I formed a life-long love affair with Bali. And there you have it. The premise of my novel ( ¾ fiction, ¼ life).

Years after this 3-month jaunt through South East Asia, my mind kept returning to my porch that overlooked the rice fields at Happy II. In 1997 I brought Megan to Bali and Happy II on our way to Kenya (where we spent a year volunteering at an orphanage). It had changed. There was a dirt road leading to Happy II from the main road with an internet hut perched at the top of the hill. There were more guesthouses where there once were rice fields. There were more people like me. We met Michael there again (he owned an export shop in CA and spent many months a year in Bali), recalling our time in 1992 with great fondness. Yes, Bali had changed, we kept exclaiming. But we didn’t dare leave.

Life.

Life happens. Wife gets a brain injury from a horseback-riding trip. Mom dies of a brain tumor. Best friend dies of an infection. And in 2009, I awoke to find that everything below my belly had become very numb. So numb, I had lost much of my balance and ability to walk without falling. An MRI showed that calcifications on the ligaments between my vertebrae and spinal cord had grown into my spinal cord and almost severed part of my cervical cord. It’s a very rare condition called OPLL, where calcifications grow slowly from birth, and the person isn’t aware of it until it actually grows into the spinal cord and causes symptoms like numbness. An emergency surgery was performed to prevent more damage to my spinal cord, but they could not revert the injury that had already taken place. I was left with titanium rods in my neck, a broken back from an intense laminectomy throughout my thoracic and cervical spine, and continued numbness in my legs that made it difficult to walk.  In a day, my life had changed.  Just like that.

Life’s blessings.

Wife.    We’ve both been through it all, and still hold hands at night. At the end of the day, we remain each other’s soft place to land.

Kid.    In between all that mess, Megan and I decided to have a child in our forties. And what a kid we have. Kai is a spunky, independent, imaginative four-year-old now and simply put, she’s the reason I’ve pushed myself through these 2 ½ years of physical therapy.

Physical Therapy.     Surgeons…whatever. Physical Therapists? Gods. Miracle workers.  All of my physical therapists have been amazing.  One let me continue going for treatment for a whole year after my stupid health insurance stopped covering it.  They essentially helped me get walking again. They, along with my awesome PCP, have been there to pick up the pieces after the surgeons wiped their hands clean of me. I am forever grateful.  I might not ever be able to walk like I used to, without effort.  But I’m so grateful that I am walking.

Novel.     I had tried to leave my corporate job many times, taking leave after leave to travel and volunteer, but somehow always managed to return to the grind and the comfortable lifestyle that working a corporate job affords. The idea of writing a novel based on my Bali experience hatched almost immediately after my trip and kept creeping into the foreground, nagging at me louder every year. I tried the writing in the nooks and crannies in between job and life. After my mom died, however, I was hit with a massive jolt of the notion that life is terribly fleeting. I told Megan that I wanted to write my novel full time. We took our pens and paper out and scribbled out a five-year financial plan that would allow me to quit my job and write. It meant a drastic lifestyle change but Megan was willing to support me to follow my dream. I’m a lucky girl.

That was 2003. Almost nine years of writing, re-writing, taking on short-term consulting gigs to keep us afloat, taking breaks for baby and familial duties…and I have never once wavered on the story I want to tell. I have questioned my writing ability. I have been frustrated at my pathetic vocabulary skills. I have gone from first-person to third-person, changed the names of my characters numerous times, and struggled struggled struggled as a writer. But I have remained steadfast in my belief of my story. I have remained steadfast in my love of Bali.

After having a kid, and especially after my spinal cord injury, I believed my days of traveling the way I was used to were over. I couldn’t wrap my head around how to bring our daughter on one of our travel adventures. Disney World? Sure. But Indonesia? I also couldn’t see how I’d manage in places where walking was necessary to get around. Where hiking was the only way to see the countryside. I grieved a lot. Of the freedom I once had to pick up and go. Of the physical person I once was. My fears were overpowering, but my desire to finish my book once and for all was greater. And in order to do that, I HAD to get back to Bali. Once again, pen and paper out, Megan and I put our heads together. We both wanted to go back. We wanted to bring our daughter. It would be different. We would not carry backpacks and hop from place to place. We would not hang out and drink Bitang beer until late at night in downtown Ubud.

We would rent a bungalow in the rice fields for a month. We would learn to cook Balinese food and immerse ourselves in village life. We would expose our child to life beyond Disney princesses and fenced-in playgrounds.

And here we are, at Villa Tatiapi, Google Earth coordinates 8 30 25.67S, 115 17 11.21E, watching the rice grow.

Life is Fleeting.

Once again, a reminder of the fragility of life splashed in my face. Once Megan and I set our plan to spend a month in Bali, I called Michael to tell him we were coming, and asked if he would be there. He said that he would be returning to the States just before we got to Bali, unfortunately. However, one month before we were to leave for Bali, I got a message from him on FB saying that he was extending his visa so we could see each other for a few days. We planned to meet – I was excited for him to meet our daughter.

Two weeks before we left, I just happen to see a post on FB from a friend of Michael’s: Rest in Peace, dear Michael.

WTF.

He had been in a shop in Bali and suffered a heart attack.

I never got to tell him that he was in my book.

Life is fleeting. I can’t waste a moment.

peace,
Carla

Posted in Uncategorized | 6 Comments

A Bali Month

Home.  It’s really good to be home.  It was really good to be there.  As we juggle with schedules and responsibilities and this pesky lingering jetlag, we try to hold onto the memories of a pretty perfect month.

Thank goodness for pictures.

Once again, thank you so much for visiting, for your gracious comments….for watchin’ the rice grow with us.  Stay tuned for updates on my novel of (most likely) the same name…

 

(click on FS on bottom right corner to see pics in full screen)

a bali month

[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_group3.jpg]Around our bungalow...
Us and our new Bali family...
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_motor2.jpg]
Our host, Agung, giving princess Kai a ride around the driveway
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_flower1.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_flower2.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_b6.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_writing.jpg]
morning tech sessions
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_pool5.jpg]
the glorious pool
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_pool7.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_b1.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_pool8.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_carlakai2.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_komangayu.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_papaya.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_ceremony1.jpg]Bali's spiritual beauty
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_temple2.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_temple1.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_temple3.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_b3.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_ceremony3.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_arguna.jpg]
Arguna Wiwaha
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_agung2.jpg]
Agung, in his ceremony garb
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_dancers.jpg]
Balinese Legong dancers
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_happy2.jpg]Around Ubud...
Happy II....not looking so happy anymore. I finally found the bungalow I stayed in 20 years ago. Sadly, bigger giants overtook the ricefields that surrounded it, and squeezed the life out of what once was paradise.
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_beadman.jpg]
the beadman
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_marketplace2.jpg]
the marketplace
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_motor1.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_gelato.jpg] Our Fave Food hangouts
Gelato...oops!
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_cafeorganik2.jpg]
Sari Organik in the rice fields...best salads
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_b5.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_cafewayan.jpg]
Cafe Wayan...best sate
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_caferice.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_beach_1.jpg]Beach days...
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_beach3.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_b4.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_rice93.jpg]Rice EVERYWHERE!
If I took the time to snap a photo of every breathtaking rice field, I'd fill up the month...
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_kairice.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_rice92.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_rice1.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_rice5.jpg]
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[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_rice4.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_kairice2.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_rice6.jpg]
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[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_agung_1.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_rice91.jpg]
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/a-bali-month/thumbs/thumbs_moon.jpg]
Full moon over Tatiapi
Posted in Bali | 3 Comments

Reflection.

Megan is knitting on the porch.  Kai is playing in the pool with Gilang and Gita, twelve years and eight years old respectively.  By this time, they are acting like older brothers and younger sister.  They tease her, and at the same time, they appease her.

It’s the lazy part of the day for everyone.  Ami, Agung’s wife, and Ayu and Komang, our house caretakers, are sitting in the shaded part of the yard eating cassava.  Agung is napping from all of his work at the temple, from driving around three crazy tourists, from being a most gracious host.

The roosters are crowing, even if it’s almost noon.  A bamboo wind chime offsets their discord.

There is still a lone worker in the rice fields, weeding along the trenches.  The rice is growing well, and now it’s just the matter of keeping the water flowin’ and ribbons scarecrow-in’.

There is a tropical breeze that breaks the intensity of the tropical sun.  From my vantage point I see five different shades of pink from flowers that burst out of the neon green leaves.  A black and white butterfly just landed on the arm of my bamboo chair.

My heart is filled with a mixture of euphoria and heaviness as we extract as much as possible from these last few days in Bali.  Of course, there has always been gratitude for this experience.  I have wanted to come back here for years and I am still pinching myself that we are here.  We have been blessed with many unexpected gifts on this trip, the most significant being our local Balinese hosts.  I have also been delighted to discover that once I got over the initial shock of Ubud’s changes, I learned to love the town in a different way, discovering that one can still find charm, especially in the corners and around the edges.  To have the choice of cool cafes (with wireless!) to hang out in is definitely cool.  To come at this time of the year, after the rainy season, when everything is in full bloom and the backdrop oozes brilliant shades of green is the best I’ve seen yet of Bali’s beauty.  Yes, it’s been a spectacular month.

But this time there are more complex emotions that I haven’t quite been able to process.

There is the absence of my friend, Michael, and the disbelief that he is gone from this earth.  I sorely missed having his insight on this visit and although I have managed to keep the thoughts of him at bay and therefore keep the knot out of my throat, his presence is everywhere in Bali.

In paradise it is easy to forget your troubles.  I have done precisely that, but with every little crack and broken brick in the sidewalks of Ubud (of which there are many) I have been reminded of my own brokenness.  I have done such a great job of acceptance back home.  Acceptance of where I’m at physically, and although I haven’t given up the hope and efforts of a healthier life, I have made peace with my physical limitations.  Here, it has been a little harder to accept that I can’t make the walk from Monkey Forest to Jalan Raya, or that every choice I’ve made has had some sort of physical consequence.  But we are lucky that there is ‘transport’ on every corner, waiting to give tired tourists a ride.  We are extremely lucky for a pool where I could do my physical therapy safely and the massage lady who has come to our bungalow many times.  I didn’t come to Bali looking to be healed, though I would have gladly accepted a splash of that holy water.  And I do leave paradise a bit healthier, thanks to the sun and the endless supply of papaya.

Kai has said, “Let’s live here forever!” several times, and I have shot a glance to Megan to see where she’s at.  Her brow rises a bit.  None of us are ready to leave.  We haven’t had enough of this slice of heaven.  But I know once we get home, Kai will be greeted with Pooh and Tigger, her princess castle, and her friend Elizabeth, and she will slide right back into place.  Megan will see at once that her garden that she started before we left is aching for her love and caring hands and she, too, will slide right in.  And me, coming home to my kitchen, my morning writing sessions at JP Licks and seeing all of our dear friends and family will be sublime.

So, the happiness, the heaviness…it’s all good.  I wouldn’t have changed a thing.  I leave Bali, perhaps not with a completed novel, but a whole arsenal of new memories to draw from for my writing.  I have recaptured every sight, smell, sound and feeling…and when I am sitting in Boston, at JP Licks with my coffee and bagel, I will close my eyes and the awareness will be that much stronger.

Thank you for coming along on this journey.  I am so grateful for the comments to keep writing, because every artist, I believe, needs that vote of confidence.  The next time I write will probably be on U.S. soil as I am expecting that our last few days here will be to savor our time with our new Balinese family and those last few bites of nasi* goring…

Selamat malam.

 

*rice.

Posted in Bali, Writing | 3 Comments

The thing about rice is…

…it’s so much more than those small, white grains sticking to your spoon.

It’s much more than the contents of the white take-out container that accompanies your moo goo gai pan.

To understand rice and its significance, particularly in Bali, is to get an exclusive glimpse into the world of the Balinese people.  For many, their lives and their religion are centered around the life of rice – the planting, growing and harvesting of the very staple that nourishes them.  And every phase is celebrated with a ceremony.

the rice fields at Tatiapi when we arrived, flooded, plowed and leveled for planting

It has been utterly fascinating to me to learn about the whole rice-growing process.  We discover our passions in the strangest of places, and for me, I think I was a rice farmer in another life.  We are very lucky to have witnessed some of the different stages of the rice cycle, right in front of our villa.  When we got here, they were still preparing the fields for planting, which entails flooding the fields and plowing and leveling the mud.  Many farmers still use water buffalo for plowing.  The irrigation system is planned in accordance to the schedule of planting, as water flows from the top of the terraced fields to the bottom in a very deliberate way.  While they are preparing the fields, they mark off one section to plant seeds that will grow into seedlings.

planting the seedlings, one by one

Ten days after we arrived at Tatiapi, the seedlings were ready to be transplanted, and we watched them plant the seedlings, one-by-one, by hand, into the prepared fields.  To watch the farmers plant is like watching someone put a blade of grass into the dirt, one at a time, until acres are covered – but like, in hypersonic speed!

 

 

 

Once the fields are planted, we, the spectators, sit back and watch the fields transform into different shades of green (while the farmers continue to manage and maintain the fields).

Watching the rice grow.

 

mature rice

At harvest time, the mature rice is threshed right in the fields, and the rice grains are laid out to dry.  After the fields have time to rest, they are flooded and the cycle starts all over again!

Phew.

All of this done by hand.  In the hot sun.

So, the next time you take a fork-full of that fluffy, white stuff…give a small nod of gratitude to those rice farmers.

Our walk through the rice terraces of Jatiluwih

endless views at every turn

contemplating rice...

 

 

Posted in Bali | 4 Comments

Sigh.

It was a week of Bali Belly, for our household of three.  Something we ate, maybe, who knows.  At least we took turns.

Sigh.

Last night I was tormented by a very big, bold mouse, and even though we were protected by our lovely mosquito nets, I still jumped at every rustle I heard.  Eventually, I asked Megan to escort me into Kai’s mouse-free room, where I crawled into bed with my daughter, to protect her.

Sigh.

I miss my gourmet kitchen at home.  I’m a bit of a foodie, and I’m not ashamed to say that I have every pot, pan, and utensil I’d ever need for cooking.  Making meals here has lately been a bit of a drag…

Yet, with all the grumbling that passes my lips, I am so very happy here.  Time is passing too quickly for us, and we’re finding that our departure date from this great island of the Gods is suddenly visible in our horizon.  Rushing to try to fit everything in is starting to disrupt our laid back, day-to-day mindset.  For me, it’s recently been a daily challenge of my ever challenging self …of wanting to do too many things.  Of course I thought I’d finish my novel here.  And why not start a blog?  Shouldn’t add that much time, right?  Then, there were the intentions of daily pool-therapy, daily walks in the rice fields with family, reading those three novels I downloaded on my nook.  Trips to Ubud.  Trips to the rice terraces.  Trips to the beach.  Let’s not forget to mention that the day before we left for Bali, I was driving around Boston, looking for a guitar case, sturdy enough to protect my guitar for check-in, because….well, how could I not have my guitar in Bali?

Sigh.

I haven’t called the local friends of my friend, Michael, yet.  To inquire of his passing.  Avoiding…

For Megan, she inquired prior to our departure about volunteering for a few hours at a local school in our nearby village.  Turns out to be the school that this villa’s proceeds go to.  She’s been in contact with the teacher, and every plan to meet has been upstaged by the village’s big Hindu ceremony.  But tomorrow, she will finally have her chance to see, first-hand, what local school life is like.

For Kai, well, she’s just happy-go-lucky until we have to prep her for the long plane ride home.  She has the pool.  She has her castle-gazebo, the gardens and the rice fields to explore in.  She has the attention of every local here.  She has the $1.50 princess dvds that have come in handy when we all need a break.  She is taking in the new culture with great finesse for a four-year old, wanting us to explain things that she hasn’t seen before and at the same time, accepting vastly different things as the norm.

…And tonight, after a long day of perusing through Ubud, I jokingly said to Agung, “Does anybody deliver around here?”

He proceeded to show me a stack of take-out menus in our bungalow – of several awesome restaurants in Ubud that deliver.  WHAAAT???  WHY HASN’T ANYONE TOLD ME ABOUT THIS BEFORE???!!!!

We got on the phone immediately.  Go figure.  Pizza delivery to the rice fields.

Sigh!

Posted in Bali, Kid, Writing | Leave a comment

The spirits are alive…

A few days ago we were invited by our host, Agung, to attend a special Hindu ceremony at his temple, a ceremony for the Gods that happens only once a year.  He and his family have been preparing for this ceremony for weeks, and one of the first things he said to us when he picked us up from the airport was, “You come on 4 of June to my temple for special ceremony?”

We were like, “Sure,” not really understanding the significance of this invitation.

Even now, I’m not sure I fully understand what it was that we were a part of that morning, but I know it was special.  To me, Bali is the most spiritual place on earth.  To fully grasp what Hinduism means to most Balinese, you almost have to live it, because, I believe, it’s more than a religion of scriptures to them.  As a mere observer, I see their  Hinduism interwoven in all aspects of their life…art, music, dance, family and rituals.  Although Hindu ceremonies seem to happen every day in Bali, this one was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, at least for us.

The day began with a curious delivery of a pile of folded cloth to our bungalow.  We determined that they were the special clothing we were to wear to enter the temple, but how on earth to assemble ourselves??  Fortunately, we found Ayu, our house caretaker, to show us exactly how to put on the clothing.  As you can imagine, it took a bit of bribery and a few white lies (these are special Balinese princess clothes!) to get Kai to consent to being wrapped in a sarong and a lacy long-sleeved top on a hot day.  But when all was said and done, we were off, decked out in ceremonial garb, side-saddle on motorbikes to the temple to join Agung and his family.  Temples in Bali are cement walled-in structures with open-air patios and shrines inside, and it seems like there’s one on every corner.  During festivals and ceremonies, they are transformed into beautiful, colorful, elaborately decorated offerings to the Gods.  Prior to a ceremony, you’ll see women congregating around a temple, making hundreds of offerings and decorations from hand, from palm leaves, flowers, fruit…

When we got to the temple, Agung led us to sit down on the cement floor to wait with everyone for the priests to process into the temple.  There were dance performances by young children to offer thanks to the Gods.  Then, the prayers were led by the priests, which was most fascinating to watch.  Each person had a small tray of offerings in front of them.  Incense was passed around to place on their trays.  Then, as the priest called out, each person would take something from their tray, like a flower, and hold it up with clasped hands to pray.  When they were done praying, they put the flower in their hair.  This ‘dance with the Gods’ was repeated until all of the offerings on their tray were offered up.  The morning was brimming with ritual.  More than an hour had passed on the hard cement floor, and although my back had turned into a mess of spasms, I could somehow transcend above the pain in a room saturated with prayer.  I eventually took our restless daughter home for lunch while Megan stayed for the rest of the ceremony, almost two hours more.  Megan came home, glowing, blessed by holy water, with rice pieces pasted to her forehead.  Being the mature 49 year-old that I am, I tried to take them off because they distracted me while she was telling me about the ceremony, but she calmly stated, “Leave them.  They’re significant.”

That was it.  It was a most significant day.

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Snapshots of life around Tatiapi

tatiapi

[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_villa_0.jpg]our 'bungalow' in the rice fields
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_porch2_0.jpg]The Porch
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_front_gate_0.jpg]the front gate!
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_sidegarde_0.jpg]the garden
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_gazebo_0.jpg]kai's castle
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_ricefields_villa2_0.jpg]the rice fields in front of us
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_rice-field_villa3.jpg]the rice fields behind us
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_planting_rice_0.jpg]planting rice, one at a time
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_ducks_0.jpg]our neighbors
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_tree.jpg]komar climbing to get us a young coconut
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_offering_0.jpg]the morning offering left on the sidewalks
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_fruit_offering_0.jpg]a fruit offering for a ceremony
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_pool_0.jpg]kai and the boys
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_porch_mk_0.jpg]megan and kai writing postcards on The Porch
[img src=http://carlaimperial.com/blog/wp-content/flagallery/tatiapi/thumbs/thumbs_guitar.jpg]jammin' on The Porch

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Postcards, airmail sheets, email, blogs, skype, sim cards…

As part of my therapeutic journaling of my travels back in the day, I would fill up quite a few post cards and those thin blue airmail sheets with news, save them all up until I could find a post office (which usually was an excursion in and of itself), and then mail them all off to friends and family.    If I were staying in one place for some time, I would have people send mail to me via poste restante to the local post office, and then…it would be the waiting game for a letter to come in for me.

When one did, it was thrilling.

Because, even though you’re off experiencing adventures in far away lands, there is ALWAYS the element of missing home.  Family.  Friends.

So getting news from home is precious and sweet.  Back in 1992 when I was backpacking through South East Asia, it was the presidential elections.  Bill Clinton and Ross Perot were up against incumbent George H. W. Bush.  I was in Bali, biting my nails on election night.  Twelve hours ahead of New York time, I remember waking up the morning after the elections occurred in the U.S., running to the center of town to one of the only public pay phones, and calling my folks.  We had a system where I would call them collect and they would call back.  By the time I had my dad on the line, a queue of other travelers had formed behind me for their turn to call home.

I remember the conversation distinctly.

“Hi Dad, who won?”

“Oh, Lyn (my mother), it’s Carla calling.  Get on the other line.  How are you, honey?  Great to hear your voice!  Where are you now?”

“Dad, who WON??”

“Well, it’s not final.  Some of the states haven’t closed their polls yet.  But it’s pretty clear who the winner is.”

“Dad, please!!!”

“It’s a pretty wide margin.”

“DAD!!”

“Clinton won!”

I shouted out, “Clinton won!” and the crowd behind me let out a collective yell of delight.  Then, I told my poor dad, who was dying for news from me, that I had to call him back because there was a line of people wanting to use the phone after me.  That news from home was particularly sublime.  I remember organizing an impromptu election party that night, at Nick’s Pension in Ubud, where even a few disappointed travelers joined us for a friendly night of celebration.

Times sure have changed.  Aside from the pesky time difference, I can pick up the phone and call my family with my gsm phone (where you buy a local sim card for a few bucks, put it in your phone, and wala!  Calling home is cheap and easy).  Or even easier is a free skype session on the computer, where you can even show your loved ones your new digs via webcam.  And if I want to reach out to many folks at one time?  A blog!

Speaking of blogs.  This is a very good time to acknowledge my inspiration for doing a blog (which I was pretty reluctant to do….the blog, that is…not the acknowledging).  As a mom of an active preschooler, I don’t have a lot of time to read, but the three blog bookmarks on my computer are ones I stumbled upon of friends of mine.  Brave souls who are willing to put themselves out there, with meaningful things to say…

Patti Roads’ blog on living healthy:  http://pattiroads.wordpress.com/

Anne Honzel’s blog on perspective, gratitude, life… http://thecarrotseeddotcom.wordpress.com/

Barrett Lester’s blog on creating tech harmony in your life:  http://athomewithtech.com/

So, thank, guys…for forging a path…

 

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Ch-ch-ch-changes…

Oh, the inevitable stroll through Ubud occurred, where every other second, one of us exclaimed, “This is SO different!”

For starters, the two main roads turned into thirty.  Jalan Bisma, the dirt road that leads to Happy II that we were suprised to find on our last trip to Bali is now a paved main road (I have not found Happy II yet).  The stalls of Bali handicrafts have turned into glass-front boutique stores.  There are now at least a dozen restaurants that serve pizza and several dozen coffee shops.  There are three gelato shops within a block from each other.  The prices have at least quadrupled.  Every Balinese man, woman, child over ten owns a motorbike (or so it seems).  Every inch of space is occupied by a shop, a restaurant or a guest house.  There is not a rice field to be seen.

There is a friggin’ STARBUCKS!

I know that change is inevitable.  But I still like to whine a little.  I remember taking Megan back to my childhood home in upstate NY, which had been surrounded by cornfields and apple orchards – all gone and replaced by McMansion developments.  I couldn’t stop obsessing and grumbling about it, while Megan sighed, “Yes, I know.  There used to be a corn field here.”

That said, as I sip on my Starbucks iced coffee ;-)

We have had some excellent dining experiences in Ubud.  Both Megan and I have stuck to the fabulous Indonesian cuisine, despite the nice international options.  I think Kai appreciates the fact that many restaurants here now have a kid menu that usually includes some form of french fries or noodles (I may have ruined chances of getting her to try the local cuisine when I gave her a taste of my satay without tasting it myself and it was insanely spicy.  Whoops.  “Mama, stop this fire in my mouth!”)   I, personally, can’t get my fill of satay, which, might not sound all that exciting (chicken, pork, or beef on grilled on wooden skewers, served with a thick peanut sauce, white rice, and usually some sliced cucumber or garnish)  but however it’s made here, well, it melts in your mouth.  Tomorrow Agung is getting us some babi guling, or suckling pig for dinner.  I can’t wait.

So, Ubud is different.  To me, the charm has diminished quite a bit.  The ease of perusing art and crafts down the street is gone.  It’s a bit overwhelming, figuring out where to eat or shop .  This is not my final report.  Check back with me in three weeks.

Satay dinner 75,000 rupiah

Starbucks tall iced-coffee 24,000 rupiah

To be able to take Ubud in, in small doses at a time, and then retreat to our bungalow in the ricefield……. priceless.

 

 

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You can take the girl out of Disney, but…

Our daughter.  Four.  Brave.  Imaginative.  Strong-willed.

Irony.  That Megan and I (who collectively own maybe one dress) would end up with a daughter who loves princesses, dressing up fancy, all that.

“Mommy, I am holding a ball tonight.  Will you wear your purple dress?” she asks Megan enthusiastically.

“Good luck with that,” I say to Megan under my breath.

It’s true.  Without any encouragement from us, Kai found her way to, not only princesses, but the DISNEY princesses.  It’s extreme, her love and obsession with them.  We try to remain supportive of her interests, and I have to admit, we’ve given in here and there by buying her princess-themed things of which there are MILLIONS.  It got to the point that she decided almost nine months ago that her name, Kai, wasn’t princessy enough.  She asked us to start calling her by her princess name.  One day it was Cinderella, the next Belle, the next day Mulan.  We went along for a while, thinking it didn’t hurt to appease her, but we tried to create boundaries of when it was okay to pretend princess (It’s NOT pretend, Mama!!) and when she had to go by ‘Kai’ (like in school).  God forbid someone addressed her by ‘Kai’.  She’d blurt out, exasperated, “That’s not my name!”

It has been an ongoing work in progress.  We’ve at least been able to have her ask politely, “Will you please call me …?” instead of screaming out indignantly.  On this trip, we’ve talked a lot about how in our villa we can address her by her princess name, but outside when we introduce her to people, we need to use ‘Kai’.   She acknowledged us and we were suddenly hopeful that Bali would be what would break this ‘stage’…..

Today, Agung took us for a short walk through the rice fields surrounding our villa to the village centre of Pejeng.  It was lovely to see the local way of life – Balinese homes and temples, children flying kites in the street, boys fixing their motorbikes, smiling faces everywhere.  I am thrilled that it’s close enough that I can do this walk.  It makes it easy that everyone strolls at a slow pace around here.  He brought us to the house that his parents and siblings live in.  In Bali, children are revered and everyone has been so loving to Kai.  We watched while Agung’s parents took Kai in their arms.  She didn’t resist.  They asked what her name is.  Megan and I held our breath.  Slowly, Kai opened her mouth to speak.

“Um.  My name is….Rapunzel.”

Damn.

 

 

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Slowly, slowly.

Day three for us -we have been happily hiding out in our villa, slowly, slowly acclimating to the time, the food, the villa with its luxuries and limitations, the weather (sunny, 80′s – perfect), with no desire to explore beyond our villa walls yet.  Agung took us grocery shopping (the big market where, as you’d expect, the local goods are inexpensive and the imported luxuries will be a splurge for us) the first day and I’ve been trying to make most of our meals here.  With a small 2-burner countertop stove as our only cooking device, it takes a bit of ramp-up time.  No coffee maker, just a coffee press.  No microwave to warm up food.  No oven.  No toaster.  So I grilled toast in our one frying pan.  Fried eggs in the same pan.  Fresh papaya, pineapple, bananas.  Mangos, come to find out, aren’t in season.  Pout.  I’ve managed to make a vegetable stir-fry with rice and spaghetti for dinner so far…I am confident that in time meals will become more vibrant as I learn about the local vegetables, the spices…

Mornings have been like this:  I wake up at 5:30, try to stay in bed, in the dark, as long as possible so I can shift (says my sleep-scientist wife).  I ignore her advice because the morning is calling out to me and I take my laptop to The Porch (I’ve decided it has earned the Capital Letters distinction) to get a little writing done before everyone wakes up.  I’ve mastered the coffee press, so I sip and write, utter bliss.

Kai wakes up next, around 7am.  She discovered a gazebo-like structure in the corner of the garden our first day here, and she promptly dubbed it her castle.  It’s actually called a Bali bale, a place for meditation or small ceremony.  It’s the first thing she visits in the morning.  Megan wakes up and we hold down our daughter long enough to get some grub in her before she’s off to jump into the pool.  She’s a water bug just like her mommy, so Megan is the next one in the pool and they spend all morning there.  Eventually I join them to do my set of aqua therapy exercises.  The pool is the most perfect pool we’ve ever swam in.  Komar, the young man who takes care of the grounds, cleans the pool every morning so it needs very little chlorine.  And that’s been our mornings, so far.

Included in the cost of our stay, Agung will drive us into Ubud twice a day.  Today, while we were swimming in the morning, I said, “I think it’s time.”

“Casa Luna for lunch?” Megan asked.

“You read my mind.”

Casa Luna opened right around the first time I came to Bali.  Janet, an Australian, married a Ketut, a Balinese, and they opened one of Ubud’s first (if not the first) bakery and cafe.  It was very unique.  You could get incredible baked goods and a good capucino, as well as Indonesian food AND pizza and pasta there.  At night they showed movies in a big room with couches and pillows.  It was a traveler’s home away from home and both Megan and I spent quite a bit of time there.  Today, Agung drove us there for lunch.  Getting our first glimpse of Ubud was thrilling and crazy (the changes) at the same time.  Gratefully, Casa Luna looked practically the same.  Ketut, the owner, was there.  He said I looked familiar and I told him that I met him and his wife twenty years ago.  He said, “Back then we were crowded every night.  Now, there are so many other dining options.”  He told that the movie room is gone.  “People can watch videos from their rooms now.”  But the ambviance – open air seating area with comfy chairs surrounded by gardens – was the same.  Our nasi campur (rice with mini sides of meat, veggies) was sublime.  The croissants….to die for.

It was our first peek at Ubud.  We went home so Kai could get a nap, craving for more of Ubud.  In time…

 

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